like father like daughter

i remember sitting down in father-daughter therapy with my dad thinking i cant wait until these 45 minutes, this is complete bullshit that he needs to be a part of my healing process. that was roughly a year ago, and i couldnt be more grateful, because understanding him i understood me...my dad sat there and told me straight up " you try to do everything, youre always stressing, you need to slow down" and im like yea watever i dont care what you have to say. and then somehow we started talking about all this pain i had in, these cut wrists, and all the things that seemed to be taking its toll on me. and somehow i asked him how he went on with things so well, despite having messed up as much as he had messed, and he told me he lives every day and then thats it, that he forgot how to regret things along time ago and instead learned how to let things just go! so i guess my biggest lesson was that life is a tumbling mess of ideas we follow through, mess of emotions i cant even understand half of the time, and my strong personal desire of hardwork=success. he told me that someway down the road, like father like daughter you can inevitably hurt the people who you love. its not that you intentionally do it, but sometimes you do things that you dont think about, and for some odd reason you dont feel guilty and you dont regret it until you see the tears and all the pain you put your loved ones in. and only then when you see their pain, does it become real that somehow youve fucked up...so i ask him what do you do then? what do you do when the person who makes you happier than anything else, is the person you hurt? what happens when you do that? how do you deal with rage, your hurt, and your conscience tearing you apart? you learn to forgive yourself, because hopefully that makes it easier to live with yourself after your mistakes, you drink a bit, and let it soak in. and perhaps from all this you learn to be a better person, and if youre lucky you will find forgiveness. if youre not so lucky, you learn to let go, and just pick it up and go with it. you learn to just forget and move on, you cant hate yourself forever, and you cant stay knowing that the person you hurt isnt forgiving you...and perhaps this is the best lesson yet...when youre hurt, learn to forgive yourself and everything else follows, if not then just pick it up and let it go. life is too short to live punishing yourself and regretting things... love my daddy for this lesson...like father like daughter!